Me Mithu

Meet me. I am Mithu, the youngest of the Mahapatras. My two most favourite people in the whole wide world are Baba and Ravi. I love talking and cuddling with them. When they are busy I tolerate mom, Jyoti and Suraj. I like Jeff better than them. Summer is wonderful because they are all home more often. I can see them outside in the evenings, enjoying themselves. If I make enough noise they take me out with them. In the picture I am listening to Baba make soft cooing sounds at me. That is how he tells me he loves me.

Baba has been home all the time lately. This week however I have seen him take his truck out a few times. He looked happy when he left and even happier when he came back. I think he likes driving. He brought home some things in the bags but nothing for me. He gives Suraj and me banana and sliced apple. He seems to notice our needs quite keenly these days.

When at home he spends time sitting on the family room sofa watching TV. In between he dozes off and misses some of the news. Of course the same thing is repeated so many times he catches it all ultimately. Is'nt life just like that too!!

I see him take his food through the tube. Very strange. He is trying small amounts of soup and rice but not enough to replace the tube feed. His favourite though is Starbucks coffee and that he somehow manages to sip by mouth. My favourite foods are pizza crust, Cashew nuts (slow roasted), naan, Mango, cauliflower, chessman cookies, potatoe chips, carrots, french fries....ok . ok.. I'll stop now. Sorry.

May 31st is mom's birthday. Don't forget to wish her. She is easy to please. All you have to do is remember it. I steal her heart every day by wishing her good morning and kissing her good night. Baba knows these tricks too. She loves having Baba home. She better get over it though for Baba has started dreaming about work.

A big Amazonian kiss from me to all of you.....Mithu.

In case you are wondering...I am a girl

Small Step For Man, Giant Step For Mankind.

These were the words that introduced me to the power of language. Papaji, my father, was sitting on the front steps of our house in Nagpur and reading 'The Times of India'. The heading 'A Small Step for Man, A Giant Step for Mankind' was plastered in huge letters across the front of the newspaper. I asked Papaji about it and he explained to me the meaning of the phrase and its reference to Niel Armstrong's historic voyage to the moon. The immensity of the moon landing got dwarfed in my mind by the epiphany of the 'Power of speech'.

Today when I saw Sachi sitting at the wheel of our car I remembered those words again.

It was a somber day in early March when I had taken the keys from him. Today all of us rejoiced in seeing Baba claim that right again. Last night we had planned that he would drive us in his truck to the grocery store. Today we got up, determined to accomplish this task, despite the torrential rains. There was a decided excitement in our getting ready for it. When time came to go, the sun came out and the day shone like newly minted penny. I grabbed my camera to capture the moment for all of us. Both of us walked into the garage and found Suraj had driven Sachi's truck to work. Suraj's truck was sitting in the garage but locked. The boys have been driving baba's car in the name of keeping the battery alive. Deflated we almost abandoned the trip but last minute decided to let my car have the honor. Seeing the pictures I think nothing could look more handsome than my hybrid car and Sachi together. He had no problem driving and plans to continue this from now on. Today he was able to eat more than half of a meat samosa and a brownie bar that Ravi had baked. Every two three days we see some small welcome change. Jyoti and Jeff are here for a day and night. The house is full with all the kids at home.

Sharing these moments with you doubles our joy. Thankyou for being there.

Ambi

The Outdoor Beckons

It is beautiful outside. The air is crisp and clean, warm enough to shed the sweater and venture out in the sunshine. Summer flowers have just begun the show. The peonies are laden with buds and red geraniums and hydrngeas are in bloom. Sachi finds plenty of reasons to get out and sit in the yard. He likes to walk over to the mail box to get the mail and retreive the newspaper. By the way do you know where the word news came from? It is made up of North-East-West-South. I am reading a lot of books these days and am bursting with hundreds of these tid bits of information. Back to Sachi. He is threatening to start driving now. He takes hydrocodone for pain and cannot drive while using it. He is trying to get off of it so he can go out in his dear truck. He continues to sample food. This is not going as well and as fast as he would like to. But there is still some progress. He gained about ten lbs. and now is steady at that weight. His endurance has definitely improved. He is joining us in more and more activities. With the boys at home there is more going on and wider variety of activities to choose from. They often convince him to accompany them for some short outings.

We are enjoying all the blessings of home life that come our way. Hope you are too.

Ambi

The Other Side Of The Tunnel

A sunny day is a welcome respite after snow and rain. Combine this with mothers day celebration and you have a lasting memory. This picture was taken just before we drove off to 'Venue', an upscale restuarant in Lincoln that the kids think is cool. Sachi found the seafood bisque and grilled Salmon appetising enough to slowly wash it down with iced tea. It was truly a heart warming dinner. We came home with great hopes and planned on many more such meal times. But alas! the road to success is two steps forward and one step back. Next day Sachi tried some rice and chicken and got sick to his stomach. So we are taking it a little easy now. Our goal at present is for him to replace one can of Nutren with oral intake. He succeeded at that today.

Ravi is going through his final exam week. Now that he has discovered the cause and effect relationship between studying and good grades we worry about him a little less. He has been studing hard and seems satisfied with his performance till now. This friday he moves back home for the summer and we are looking forward to again being able to kiss him good night (against all his protests). Suraj and Ravi's answer to my night time love you is, 'Ya Ya'. Their confidence in our love always brings smile to my face (parents are such suckers). Suraj has one more month to go before he gets off for summer.

Jyoti and Jeff are busy this week and we will see them over the weekend again. Jyoti is doing all right. It was wonderful to get all your congratulations. Sachi and I have been looking at the kids' baby pictures and imagining our home full of toys again. Future is a wonderful thing to have.

As Sachi gets better we are looking forward to seeing all of you. . . . . Ambi.

Happy Mothers Day

Ambi's mother........................... Sachi's mother God could not be every where so He made mothers

From Ambi

My absolute first memory is of a smell. This smell is warm, comforting, velveteen and safe. I cannot name this smell but when I am with Biji I know she is it. In my heart 'home' for me is where I lived with her. My moral compass was set by her in those years and has been passed on to our kids. She was a quiet but firm presence in my childhood, a cheerleader who was always there when I needed her. She was happy to be in the background so I could shine. I owe so much to her and yet am under no debt. Her love was unpretentious and undemanding. Did I ever remember to thank you Biji?

I understand you only in my own role as mother. I have looked at Jyoti, Suraj and Ravi with the same eyes that I remember you looking at me. Through them I know how much you love me. I rebelled against your idea of the role for women but imbibed the spirit with which you approached motherhood. Your shyness encouraged me to become outgoing, your accepting nature gave me space to ask questions. Your devotion to home gave me security to explore far off lands, your unconditional pride in me gave me permission to become my own person; so different from you yet closer to you than ever. Thankyou for being my mother. . . . . . Ambi.

FROM SACHI ---

My dear Bou(mother),

On this mother's day, all your six children are sending you best of wishes, lots of love & pranam for long years of hard work, sacrifices, love & compassion in bringing us up which I am sure was not an easy task.

All through our childhod & adult life we have always been amazed by your unusual capabilities. You got married at age 15 ; my brother & I were born in next two years. Immediately after that you went back to complete high school & graduated in respectable 1st class. When you had five children my father went to England for two years & we all lived with grandparents where more help was available in taking care of children. You signed up & completed two years of college( in good grades ) during that time. We always thought you would have been outstanding if you pursued an academic carrier. However after the 6th child was born in 1953 , you folded up that ambition & became a full time mother & a home tutor for every subject. After that we felt you grew a pair of eyes on the back of your head, always catching us at the wrong times.

Bringing up children in 1940s & 50s was way different from 80s, 90s & beyond. Every once in a while it had occured to us (in light of more modern standards) how several things could have been done differently with us for better outcomes. But as we grew up into more mature individuals & able to put things in right perspective, we realized, how wrong & unwise it is to be stuck with 'could have, should have, would have' mind set & always think , the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. Once we get out of that mode we suddenly see the light that, every mother is unique & at the same time identical that, for them, children are the absolutely top priority: their safety, security & their wellbeing. We have seen & felt this from childhood till today. It is so comforting Bou(mother) to have been receiving so much love , care, compassion & concern throughout our lives. We are all so blessed.

Everything said & done we six were not the easiest ones to have taken care of. We all remember the hardships you had to overcome in the process. Often you used to tell us , how we will understand all these when we became parents. We indeed have found that out the hard way.

Next to God you are the person to have given us life, which is the most important thing/blessing we have. Even then we often pray for all material things to enjoy life. God's answer to that is - You have been given life so that you can enjoy all things. How true!

Bou, we all love you very much & consider it a blessing to have been born in Mahapatra family. Have a very happy Mother's day.

I offer myself to Thee (God), relieve me of bondage of self, take away my shortcomings, that I may better do Thy will & live the life of Your will.------------ God bless you all.

Interest Is Dearer Than The Principal

Jyoti and Jeff with their 12 week baby.

It can wiggle its fingers, make grimaces and shut its eyes.

Right now it is the size of a lime and fills their whole world.

मूल नालों सूद प्यारा।
Interest is dearer than the original investment

(an old Punjabi saying)

My grandmother used to take my face in her hands and say these words to me while kissing my forehead. Papa Ji would explain to me that he, the son, is the original investment and I, the grandchild, am the interest. Sachi and I will get to say these words to our grandchild this November. Needless to say we feel very blessed. A child is God's way of saying this world should go on.

Jyoti is doing well. She has some morning sickness (at all times of the day) and a little less energy than before but is able to work full time and visits us often. Jeff is ecstatic and pleased as a peacock. Both of them are searching for good names. Any ideas!!!

Sachi has newfound incentive to get better quickly. He has just today started to regularly ingest a few calories of nutrition by mouth. Every journey has to start with a first step. He hopes to slowly get rid of the peg tube. It would be hard to pick up the baby otherwise. He is also practising walking in anticipation of keeping up with the precious bundle of joy.

We loved seeing the world through our children's eyes. We will doubly enjoy seeing it again through this grandchild. You have shared so much of yourself with us. We want you to be part of our happiness. . . . . . Ambi.

Piece Of Cake

Yesterday was a big day. Definitely a red letter day. After many days of being home-bound the boys convinced Baba on friday that he was ready for the Mahapatra family Movie Night. We went to see Iron Man. It was a really good experience. Many of Suraj & Ravi's friends (the crowd was mostly young kids) came over to shake hands with Sachi and wish him luck. I thought this evening would be the highlight of the week; But on sunday, that is yesterday, we crossed another long awaited milestone that dwarfed the happiness of the movie night.

Ravi's college was honoring the track team with a banquet at the Embassy Suites. Sachi decided we should attend this. We got all dressed up, even Ravi (and I did not have to bribe him). Ravi lettered (which in America means excelled) in track and received the honor along with many others. We were seated at a table with a senior student and his family. The grandfather turned out to be a client of NHI and had been operated for by-pass surgery by Sachi's partner (Dr. Hedderich). They were a friendly group and we were enjoying the evening. The table was laden with all sorts of food; Chicken, pasta in alfredo sauce, breads, desserts and drinks. We were all enjoying the meal. Sachi seemed to be enjoying the conversation. Then unexpectedly he reached over and made a cup of coffee for himself. I stopped eating. He gingerly took one sip, then another. No coughing, no grimace, no choking. We both looked at each other with a pleased smile in our eyes. I wanted to stand up and hand him a certificate of achievement too. He followed the few sips of coffee with a spoon of cheese cake and finished the night with a scoop of mango ice cream at home. Today he stuck to the tube feed though. Tomorrow he is scheduled for the swallow test. I am sure he will do OK on it.

I have been very busy planting the annuals in the front yard. I gave Jyoti and Jeff two pots (pink Petunias and multicolored Gerber daisies) that in a month should be full of flowers. Jeff is the gardner in their house. He is planning some elaborate projects for their landscaping this year. Today it was 81*F. Soon we will be complaining of hot weather. Ravi, due to the athletics practice of many hours everyday, already has a mid-summer's tan. Few more weeks and he will match Barrack Obama, whom he plans to vote to power this election. He is growing a beard for a Mexican festival and has promised to shave on tuesday. He had shaved his head to empathise with Baba. Since Sachi (against all odds) never lost his hair, poor Ravi is waiting for his to grow.

Jyoti and Jeff are coming over for two days tomorrow. Maybe we will be able to celebrate Sachi's re-introduction to food. He is doing quite good with daily activities. I have not heard him complain of exhaustion after bath lately. He has also been paying some bills and sorting out the medical insurance papers. It is nice to have him moving around in the house all day; occasionally we even manage to annoy each other.

We are rejoicing time spent together.

I hope your life is as full as ours seems to be to us. . . . . Ambi.

Under Tender Loving Care

When awake Sachi can see all these blooms from the window; something he is doing more and more every day. He is staying awake longer and joining us in many of the activities. He is even getting hungry. The flavor of foods being cooked in the kitchen is chipping away at the damage done by radiation to his taste buds. He is waiting for the swallow test to be done so he can begin to eat. We always think of the sense of taste and smell as leading to excesses of gluttony. It is in the abscence of these senses, however, that we truly realise the survival role they play in saving mankind from extinction.

I am slowly resuming regular work and leaving home for few hours as needed. Sachi is doing fine by himself during these times; I, on the other hand, am experiencing seperation anxiety. Pressure of house work, gardening and kids are helping me get back on track. It is however fun to still sit cozily on the sofa and spend hours and hours flipping through >150 channels watching anything and everything. Sachi lets me hold the remote. I can see that this will be changing soon. He looks quite alert and one of these days he is going to try and assert his male prerogative.

It is the first day of May today. The year till now has sped by in a blink it seems, inspite of our days having been so slow, proving Einstein's theory of relativity. The summer I hope will linger along giving us time to cherish our blessings.

HAPPY MAY FROM ALL OF US TO ALL OF YOU

. . . Ambi